I wonder if they get a lot of nightmares, living on that street?
After staying up an hour past when I normally go to bed the other night, Dana and I talked for a good while. (I love these talks. They are some of the best time that we share and really communicate.) Because I get up at 5:00 normally, this means I went to bed at 10:30 and we probably talked until 11:00.
Some time around 3:30 in the morning, Naomi decides she’s awake and is happily chattering away in her crib. Three Thirty in the Morning. The baby monitor makes it pretty hard to not know that she’s awake, so I lie there, listening to her talk to all her stuffed animals in her bed.
Then, I realize that my ear itches. Normally, this would not be a big deal; Step 1) scratch ear without thinking much about it, Step 2) forget. However, around this time last year, Dana had an ant crawl into her ear (you can read more about that here and here). And we’ve been seeing ants around the house a little bit again this year. So in my tired, but awake state, I pretty much convinced myself that there could be an ant trying to get in my ear, and I kept thinking about it, and trying to block/clean out/scratch my ear. Which only tickled it more, which made me think even more that there could be an ant trying to get into my ear… (repeat until insanity ensues).
When I had turned down the monitor so that I could only hear Naomi if she yelled, and fully convinced myself of the complete lack of insects anywhere near my ear, I almost got back to sleep. Except I realized I had to pee. I hesitated, because I didn’t want Naomi to hear the toilet flush, and think I was up and coming to get her. But eventually I had to do what I had to do. After I did, the cat (who does NOT sleep in our room, because he likes to lick us and sleep on our heads) thought it was time for me to get up and he started meowing, expecting me to feed him and give him access to our bedroom (which is what happens every morning after I wake up).
After a while, Naomi’s happy chatter woke up Dana and she went and turned off the monitor. At which point, I noticed it was about 5 minutes until the alarm would go off.
I remember being in a Bible study once when the teacher pulled out a book about discipleship and read ten or so characteristics of a disciple. They were things like being holy and devoted and knowledgeable and all that. They sounded nothing like the characteristics of the disciples in the Bible. The author was well meaning, of course, but it’s no doubt tempting to hang a carrot in front of people telling them they have to “become” in order to be used by God rather than admitting they actually “become” while they are in the process of being used by God. It’s an important paradigm shift for all of us because otherwise we’d be too intimidated to take the first step.
Here are some actual characteristics of the disciples I think we can safely trust. If you resonate with any of these, you’re in a good spot and likely following Jesus:
1. You think Jesus wants to take over the government so you cut off a soldiers ear in order to get the fighting started. (The neo cons are definitely disciples!)
2. You keep pestering Jesus about who he will give more power to in heaven.
3. You have no theological training but own a small fishing business which somehow makes you qualified because you “get it.”
4. The Holy Spirit crashes into one of your mini sermons so everybody can speak different languages and outsiders think you’re drunk.
5. People ask you if you know Jesus and you freak out and say no and run away.
6. You hear they killed Jesus on a cross and you figure the whole thing was a wash and you got duped.
7. You choose other disciples by playing rock, paper scissors.
8. You teach bad theology and have to have somebody else come over and correct you.
So there you go. My guess is there’s a place in there for you. So if you’re confused about theology or power hungry or just an average idiot, take the first step. You’ll get sorted out along the way. The disciples “became” some pretty great guys in the end.
Welcome to Washington, the “
This is a “Safe Place” for children to get grabbed from behind by creepy people.
This is a “Safe Place” to do your creepy child-grabbing.