Every so often I find myself swimming in a sea of insomnia. This week has been one of those weeks. I wonder how many people Google search “insomnia” in the middle of the night. I usually do. In the wee hours of the evening, when my brain is begging for answers as to why I’m still awake, I always read about how I should avoid stimulating things right before bed. This fact makes me laugh every time…because I usually read this while looking at my computer (which is the #1 thing to stimulate the brain in the evening).
The other night, I really wanted to watch a movie (yet another stimulating activity), but I grabbed my Bible instead and sat on the couch next to my snoring cat. I sat there for a while…trying to decide what to read. I flipped through the pages of my old, worn Bible. As I felt the soft pages brush up against the tips of my fingers, I prayed about my insomnia. When I’m awake at night, it totally throws off the next day. I am crabby. I am sleepy. I am unproductive. And Aaron and I will be on a totally different schedule until I start sleeping again. So, I lifted up my emotions to the Lord and proceeded to open my Bible. For whatever reason I started reading Psalm 56…and soon discovered that the Holy Spirit wanted my heart to hear these words:
“You’ve kept track of my every toss and turn
through the sleepless nights,
Each tear entered in your ledger,
each ache written in your book.”
Thank you, Lord, for being near and for keeping track of my sleepless nights.