Pumpkin

— Aaron

Who ever thought of making a pie out of a frickin’ pumpkin? It’s one of the most absurd thoughts I’ve ever heard of. Pumpkins aren’t sweet, nor are they naturally soft, unless they rot, and no one in their right mind would eat a moldy, rotten pumpkin. So who came up with that bright idea?

Really, why do we cultivate pumpkins? People do eat the seeds, but I’m pretty sure there’s no tremendous demand for them. We buy them so that we can mutilate them into strange charactures of our faces, but don’t eat them. And we alter them so much you can’t recognize them, and turn them into pies. They’re rather unnecesary.

And yet, at the same time, baked pumpkin products (such as pies) are pretty much awesome. Unnecessary, but awesome.

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3 thoughts on “Pumpkin

  1. And why are we so partial to pumpkin pie…What about other gourds? Couldn’t we eat creamy yellowy yummie squash pie instead? What is wrong with squash pie people?!!

    And why don’t we mutilate squash into funny faces? If we are going to have a tradition as obscure as delicious pumpkin pie an Jack o’ Lanterns, shouldn’t we give all gourds a try? That’s veggist.

  2. Is a veggist someone who is like a racist but is partial to certain vegetables? Because if it is, that is just hillarious…

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